There is a bizarre phenomenon going on at the Oakland end of Telegraph, and that phenomenon is the seafood/burrito combination destination.
We don't understand why fried fish and burritos go together. Chinese food and donuts make sense - the deep fryers are on and ready to go. So fried fish and Chimichangas might make some logical sense, but tacos & burritos & fried fish? Bizarre.
Despite our fear that trying to focus on 2 styles of disparate street food might lead to disaster on both fronts, we bravely entered Off the Hook.
Now, in retrospect we should have ordered both fish and burritos. Unfortunately, I hate fried food and my Partner in Crime (PIC) wasn't in the mood for grease either. So this review will focus solely on the Mexican food.
What we ordered: 3 shredded beef crispy tacos, 1 chicken burrito with light rice
Service: polite, insular and lost in translation (the guy didn't speak much English; fortunately, I speak Spanish)
Atmo: depressingly fluorescent & sparsely linoleum
Crowd: local crackhead scene
Spent: $12.77
Overall rating: 2.5 sporks (-1 due to not being helped out by staff with the crackhead problem)
This end of Telegraph is pretty ghetto - and not in the ghetto fab kinda way. There are a lot of crackhead types hanging around and going to Off the Hook after dark led us to fear somewhat legitimately for our safety, as some dirty and addled jackass came in shortly after we did, said "This is a stickup" in a lameass attempt for attention, and then proceeded to hassle me to buy him dinner.
I ignored this guy and gave him my best "Fuck off" vibe, but he ignored my studious attempts to ignore him and kept interrupting my conversation with the order guy and continued to ask/demand that I buy him a burrito. I told him no, so he pointed out that a taco was cheaper. I finally became exasperated and - very obviously frustrated- told the guy that I was just trying to order dinner. He mumbled something indignant (and most likely insulting) and left.
I have to admit it: we felt racially and gender-profiled at this point. There were other patrons in the restaurant, but did Addled Asshole Guy ask anyone else for money? No, he didn't - just us. It seemed like he thought he could bully a couple of white girls into giving him money by scaring us. I hate this shit, and it's one of the things about Oakland that really bums me out. Oakland is a fantastic city with so much to offer, but this kind of ghetto-ass nonsense does rear its ugly head on all-too-frequent occasions.
I would have expected that the order-taker guy might have been more interested in protecting his patrons from being hassled by drugged-up street trash, but he's either just used to this crap or not interested in getting involved from behind his (bullet-proof?) glass. Note to owners of small businesses in "transitional" neighborhoods: if you want to improve the caliber of your patrons and encourage repeat business from folks who actually work for a living, you need to take an active role in protecting your patrons from being harassed. It's not my job as a consumer to enforce the "We reserve the right to refuse service" law - that's your job.
In any case, once we were left to peace we finally got our order in. It came within 10 minutes and we took it home to eat.
The first surprise was the tacos. They were HUGE! Three was too many - two tacos are more than enough food for one person, unless you're famished. The shredded beef was good and there was lots of it - it tasted like someone's mom made it for us. The only drawback was that the shells were so loaded with stewed beef that they fell apart, but the flavor was great and the sheer size of these things made up for it.
The chicken burrito was also good and ginormous, and it seemed that "light rice" afforded me extra chicken. This was an extra bonus, and the chicken itself was very tasty and, again, tasted like something that someone's Mexican grandma might make me.
We'd been looking for a really close 'hood place to get a quality and huge Mission-style burrito (the burrito place on Piedmont is really average and American-tasting), and this place fits the bill. We might back for the food if it was light out, except that there's a fairly new Mexican place that's also pretty cheap on 51st just off Telegraph. That place has sustainably-farmed meat and - in our experience - no addled homeless types hassling anyone for money.
If you want a big and super cheap Mission-style burrito and don't mind chancing an annoying run-in with a ne'er-do-well, this is the place for you.
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Off the Hook Seafood & Burritos - 2270 Telegraph Ave - 9.13.07
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1 comment:
You know, they treat Black people with soooo much disrespect. I've been in their by myself and with friends and have always felt disrespected. The majority of their patrons are black and they treat them with disrespect and distrust. Often these businesses in Black neighborhoods are very mean to their Black patrons even though the Black people who eat here are their bread and butter. I've been anoyed with them for a while but they are a quick bite in the neighborhood after Taco Bell has closed and you don't have to use cash. I'm horrible at carrying cash so I often find myself after work hungry ordering a greasy bit of their food. I recently wanted to eat their nachos which are over stuffed with meat that is not properly drained of fat. The chips are always soggy by the time I get home. I asked for my meat on the side. The owner refused but was unable to give me any reason other than "in five years I've never done it." I had been willing to put up with the $.50 charge to use my debit card (only something that businesses in black neighborhoods ever do), the $.35 cents charge for an extra packet of ketchup, the $1.00 charge for an extra gram of ranch, and all of the mean and rude signs all over the place. I was even willing to put up with the often disrespectful proprietor barking at me through the plexy glass. I however will not put up with being told that I can not have a simple modification on my nachos because "he's never done it." Not that he would have to charge me extra but that he just didn't want to. I believe that this place is another on the long list that exists in Black neighborhoods that disrespect their black patrons terribly. I believe that now that the area is getting more popular with whites and east Africans that are moving in this business will fall to the weyside in favor of other more quality restaraunts that are popping up. Other than their racism the place smells like piss, can't be clean and is nothing near authintic. By the way, Mexican grandmothers don' make burritos sweety. Burritos were invented in America by Americans. So your claims of authenticity are flawed. You'll probably delete this for a number of reasons including the fact that you lilke this place and are probably not a person of color and have thus not experienced the racism that these folks spew.
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